This week is Multiple Birth Awareness Week here in Australia, and the theme for 2016 is “leave no family behind“. I’m very excited about this years theme, and I think it opens up some opportunities to talk about multiple-baby loss.
As someone who lost both of my multiple babes, I have often felt left behind within the multiple birth community. I must say I can’t wholly blame the community itself for that though, I have purposely distanced myself a bit because it is quite hard to see happy, healthy multiples when mine never made it home. But I also never felt particularly welcome in my local AMBA group because multiple-loss is a topic that’s rarely mentioned by them.
This years theme is very all-inclusive though and it’s beautiful. It’s encouraging to see the words “leave no family behind” emblazoned on a flyer, like a special reassurance that I’m not being forgotten, even though I’m a very different kind of twin mum.
The Australian Multiple Birth Association, who run MBAW, provides support for all multiple families (even if I feel like my kind of family is left out sometimes) and I found it to be an excellent resource while pregnant.
Much like this blog, I joined the AMBA in the early stages of my pregnancy. I loved their forum. If you don’t log in often enough though, your account becomes inactive – I remember after losing my boys I’d get warning emails from them and rush to log in because I couldn’t bear the thought of my account becoming inactive, even though our boys were no longer here. Their forum also has a bereavement sanctuary, which I posted in occasionally during those rushed log ins. But it seemed so lonely compared to the rest of the forum. Every time I logged in there were newly-pregnant multiple mums posting in the introduction section, but it was rare that the bereavement sanctuary had a new post. At some point during my grief journey, logging into this forum just became too much and I ignored the warning emails.
Actually, my last email from the AMBA community forum came just before Multiple Birth Awareness Week last year. I got it in the midst of being interviewed over email by my local newspaper about MBAW itself. I guess perhaps I took that as some sort of sign – instead of holding onto the past, I had moved forward into a future where I was trying to help other multiple-loss families.
This year to commemorate Multiple Birth Awareness Week, I’d like to take another step towards helping other families like mine. In memory of my sweet twin boys, and in the spirit of the “leave no family behind” theme, I have created a fundraiser page through Bears of Hope to raise money for two Cuddle Cots to be donated to my local hospital.
You can find out all about Cuddle Cots, and donate to the cause, by clicking here.
Happy Multiple Birth Awareness Week everybody xx